It’s weird and creepy that we decorate for a holiday for children using fake human corpses – bodies that have decomposed so far that their rotting flesh has fallen off their bones. Let’s not worry about that; Halloween is just around the corner, so let’s make some skeleton jokes and puns! Skeletons are technically educational, as they are shown in science classrooms, laboratories, and intelligent people’s offices in movies and TV shows. Therefore, skeletons are quite versatile if you think about it that way. As a spooky seasonal decoration as well as a learning tool, they serve a dual purpose.
In our skeleton at birth, we have about 270 bones, but in adulthood, we only have 206. What’s the reason? Over time, a lot of our bones fuse together. This is what you need to know! Originally from Greek, skeleton means “dried up” (just like my bank account).
Here are some more skeleton jokes and puns you’ll love – no bones about it.
Best Skeletons Jokes
Skeletons One-Liner
- What was the skeleton doing at the hockey game?
Driving the ZAM-boney.
- Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
- Why didn’t the skeleton make it to the dance?
He couldn’t dance because he didn’t have a partner.
- Skeletons without friends are called what?
Bonely.
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A.
- Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
- Skeletons who go out in the snow are called what?
A numb skull.
- Why didn’t the skeleton laugh at the joke?
Because he had no funny bones.
- What does a skeleton order in a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
- How do French skeletons say hello?
“Bonjour!”
- If a skeleton rings a doorbell, what do you call him?
A dead ringer.
- Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
Nobody.
- A skeleton said something to another skeleton. What was it?
“You’re dead to me.”
- Why didn’t the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn’t in it.
- Why did the skeleton get sent to jail?
Because he was rotten to the bone.
- Why did the skeleton fight?
Because he had a bone to pick.
- What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
“Will you marry me?”
- When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone.
- Skeletons who attend school but don’t work are called skeletons.
Lazy bones.
- Why do skeletons hate the cold?
It sends chills up their spines.
ADVERTISING
- What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler.
Dark Skeleton Jokes
- Is there any reason why the skeleton knew rain was coming?
He could feel it in his bones.
- A skeleton dropped out of medical school, didn’t you hear?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
- When the skeleton spent too long by the fire, what happened to him?
became bone dry.
- What kind of TV does a skeleton watch?
A skeleton.
- In a sea full of sharks, what happened to the pirate ship?
It came back with a skeleton crew.
- Why are skeletons so adept at telling jokes?
Because they have funny bones.
- Skeletons serve tea on what kind of dishes?
Bone china.
- What is a skeleton’s favorite mode of transport?
A scare plane.
- If a skeleton cannot use his scare plane, what can he do?
A skeleton-copter.
- When skeletons set sail, what do they say?
“Bone voyage!”
- How did the skeleton end up in the hospital? What type of candy did it eat?
Jawbreakers.
- Skeletons hate the wind for what reason?
Nothing. It goes through them.
- Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
- What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
A trombone.
- What’s a skeleton’s second favorite instrument?
A sax-a-bone.
- What is a skeleton’s favorite film?
A spine-tingling.
- Why did the skeleton climb up the tree?
Because a dog ate his bones!
- Who is the most famous French skeleton?
Napoleon Bone-aparte.
- What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
“You suck.”
- Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones.
Skeleton Jokes for Kids
- A skeleton with a temperature of 103 degrees was treated by the doctor. What was the doctor’s response?
“Looks like you run a femur.”
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite rock band?
The Grateful Dead.
- Skeletons like to eat fish, but what kind?
Carpals.
- What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
- Why did the skeleton go to the dance?
To see the boogie man.
- In skeletal circles, what is half the diameter?
The radius.
- The skeleton student stayed late at school for what reason?
He was preparing for his exam.
- When it comes to getting into their homes, what do bony people use?
A skeleton key.
- Skeletons who attend coffee shops and listen to indie music are called what?
A hipster.
- Skeletons love using their cell phones for what?
Take a selfie.
- Why couldn’t the police arrest the skeleton?
They couldn’t pin anything on him.
- The skeleton knew the other skeleton was lying, but how?
He could see through him.
- What Spanish food do skeletons enjoy the most?
Patella.
- While riding his motorcycle, the skeleton said what?
“I’m boned to be wild!”
- Why did the skeleton be taken to the hospital?
To have his gallbladder removed.
- The lie told by a skeleton is called what?
A fibula.
- What did the skeleton say to his wife?
“I love every bone in your body.”
- What is the best job for a skeleton on a construction site?
Cranium operator.
- Is there a room in the house that skeletons dislike the least?
The living room.
- What was the old-fashioned way that skeletons sent mail?
The bone express.
- How much does an elephant’s skeleton weigh?
Skeletons.
Skeletons Jokes for Adults
- What type of art do skeletons like?
Sculptures!
- What do skeletons complain about?
Aching bones.
- Why do skeletons drink so much milk?
It’s healthy for the bones!
- Why did the skeleton take to acting classes?
He wanted a Tibia star.
- Where do bad jokes about skeletons belong?
In the skull in.
- Why can’t skeletons fly over Area 51?
It was a no-fly-bone.
- What type of pasta does a skeleton prefer to eat?
Elbow macaroni.
- Who is a skeleton’s favorite female movie star?
Ulna Thurman.
- When a skeleton cuts through objects, what does it use?
A shoulder blade.
- What kind of jokes do skeletons tell?
Humerus ones.
- What kind of birds do skeletons resemble?
Sea skulls.
Funny Skeleton Jokes
- Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones. - What was the skeleton’s favorite musical instrument?
The trombone. - When a skeleton doesn’t work, what do you call it?
Lazy bones. - What song do skeleton bikers ride to?
Bones to be wild. - How do skeletons communicate when they are heading out to sea?
Bone voyage! - When skeletons sent mail, how did they do it?
The boney express! - What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
You suck. - Who is the most famous French skeleton?
Napoleon’s bone-apart. - What was the skeleton’s method of predicting rain?
It could feel it in its bones. - After a heist, what song does a skeleton crook listen to?
I’m rotten to the bone.
Rude Skeleton Jokes
- What do skeletons order in restaurants?
Spare ribs! - What was the skeleton’s favorite rock band?
The Grateful Dead. - Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin. - What kind of plate do skeletons eat on?
Bone china. - Is there a reason why the skeleton didn’t go to the scary movie?
He didn’t have the guts! - What type of art do skeletons like?
Sculptures! - What was the purpose of the skeleton going to church to play music?
They have no organs! - Why did the skeleton go to the dance?
To see the boogie man. - How do skeletons say hello?
Bonjour. - What do old skeletons complain about?
Aching bones. - What do you call a skeleton who uses a doorbell?
A dead ringer. - Why do skeletons hate winter?
Because the cold goes through them. - Why didn’t the skeleton eat spicy food?
It was too much for him to handle. - In order to get into their homes, boney people use what?
Skeletons keys! - Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
Nobody.
Skeletons Joke Sans
- Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to the body shop. - Why do skeletons drink milk?
The bones benefit so much from milk! - What was the reason for the skeleton pupil’s late arrival at school?
He was preparing for his exams! - Why did the skeleton run up the tree?
A dog wants to eat its bones. - Why don’t skeletons like parties?
They cannot dance because they don’t have anyone to dance with. - When a skeleton calls his friends, what does he say?
A telephone. - When does a skeleton laugh?
When something tickles his funny bone. - A skeleton who went out in the snow is called what?
A Numbskull! - What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A bone-chilling tree! - Skeletons without friends are called what?
Bone-ly!
